Something I've been working on since we heard about Disease. Feedback is greatly appreciated. Note: ***** denote flashback sequences Lesa ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Paramount owns the characters. I'm just playing with them. Destination Determined By Lesa L. Contains spoilers for: Scorpion, The Gift, Bliss, Dark Frontier & Disease "Delta Flyer log, 0816, Seven of Nine recording. We have landed on an uncharted M class planet. The Captain authorized an away mission in the Delta Flyer to the planet, ten light years out of Voyager's path. The personnel consisted of Neelix, Ensign Kim and myself. Our mission was to set up a base camp for the crew to use for shore leave and begin gathering foodstuffs to replenish our stores." "I estimate that we will be out of contact with Voyager for at least five more hours due to the ion storms in the region. Neelix and Ensign Kim were both injured during a storm we encountered prior to entering the planet's atmosphere. I was able to land the Delta Flyer safely, only suffering a bruised shoulder and began treating their injuries." "Neelix's injuries were relatively minor. They consisted of a fractured wrist and a bruised rib. He awoke naturally and has left the Delta Flyer to survey the surrounding area." "Ensign Kim's injury was more severe. He was in the storeroom when we encountered the ion storm and due to his unsecured position suffered severe head trauma. I have treated it as best I can, however I am concerned that due to the area of the injury he may suffer some form of short term memory loss while he heals. I have written a report explaining the incident, the ensuing injuries and the course of treatment I provided. The information was attached to a subspace message that will be sent in intermittent intervals, which I am confident, will make it through the distortion effects of the ion storm. It is my hope the Doctor can suggest other methods of treatment that may further Ensign Kim's recovery. I believe Ensign Paris would call this 'covering all the bases.' While I at times find the Doctor's manner annoying, his medical knowledge is unsurpassed and his assurance that Ensign Kim will recover would be gratifying. Computer, pause recording." Seven looked out of the Delta Flyer at the surrounding terrain of the planet. It appeared to be late spring or early summer in this hemisphere and the temperature outside was 17 degrees Celsius and would by her calculation eventually arrive at 24 degrees. *Perfect weather* according to the crewmembers. She remembered the staff meeting she had attended when the Captain had discussed this mission. ***** ***** ***** ***** Neelix suggested an area roughly thirty miles inland as the best area in his opinion to gather food stuffs and have shore leave. Ensign Paris questioned the idea, asking whether they should land by the ocean to possibly catch fish and shellfish. The Captain appeared amused rather than annoyed by his suggestion, "Don't worry Tom, you'll get to go to the beach before we're finished." Lieutenant Torres rolled her eyes at the satisfied look on his face. Commander Chakotay then observed with a grin, "Maybe if you're nice to Naomi she'll let you borrow some of her sand toys." This had elicited smiles from all the members present, except for Commander Tuvok, Ensign Kim and herself. "Captain," the young Ensign had said. "I'm not sure that I'm the best choice to head this mission." The room fell silent. Lieutenant Torres bit her lip as she looked back and forth between Ensign Kim and the Captain. Ensign Paris looked worriedly at his friend. Seven had focused her attention on Ensign Kim who seemed unwilling to meet the Captain's or anyone's eye. Ensign Kim continued, "I just thought that since we're in a relatively quiet area of space my time might be better spent doing some ship wide tests." The Captain had glanced at Commander Chakotay who then spoke up, "Thanks for the offer Harry but Operations are in fine shape at the moment, restocking our larder and shore leave is top priority at the moment. You've been through a lot lately, everyone has," he added. The Captain added icily, "You're going on this mission Ensign. You don't have to enjoy yourself." "Aye Captain," Ensign Kim said. Seven observed a red flush of embarrassment cover his face and he looked down at the Padd he had carried in. After the meeting had adjourned, she had felt curiously unwilling to return to Astrometrics. She knew that one of the Ensign's Delaney was assigned there for two more hours, she also knew that the Doctor was scheduled for holodeck time at the moment. It was time for an examination she decided and headed to the Sickbay. "Hi Seven, what can I do for you?" Ensign Paris greeted her as she entered. "I require an examination," she stated. "Really?" he glanced down at the Padd he was holding. "I don't see you scheduled for two more days." "That is correct," she replied. "However I will be on the away mission at that time and the Doctor has been adamant that I not miss appointments. Are you capable of performing an examination?" "I think I can handle it," Tom said, approaching her and entering commands on his Padd. "So what's up?" "Up?" Seven asked with an arched brow. "Yes, what's up. That means, what's new? What's on your mind?" "I see, another idiomatic expression. I am concerned about the away mission." "There's nothing to worry about. It's fairly straight forward. Land, set up a base of operations and have fun." "Fun is not my priority." Tom grinned at her. "Yeah, I've noticed that." He added, "I envy you guys." "Explain." "That planet looks lovely. No inhabitants. No threatening animals. Plenty of rivers, lakes, oceans plus lush vegetation. It's paradise. You'll be the first people to sent foot on virgin soil, like Adam and Eve." "Adam and Eve. An ancient biblical reference to the first beings created by the Christian God. I do not recall a Talaxian in that story." Chuckling Tom agreed, "Okay you win. But you should still look forward to it." "Ensign Kim does not appear to be looking forward to it," she said pointedly. His expression sobered as he replied. "I know. Harry's been through a lot lately. It'll be good for him to get away." "He does not appear to be recovering from his experiences with the Varro female." "He's better. It's not just recovering from the symptoms that he's dealing with. He's also facing the fact that she drove him so far over the edge that he would have done anything to be with her. I know Harry, he's the most upstanding Ensign in Starfleet. The thought of what he could have done is really bothering him." "It is a shame that he did not consider the ramifications before he allowed his baser instincts to predominate," Seven said coldly. "You don't understand what happened," Tom replied. "It wasn't just baser instincts, it was chemistry." "Elaborate." Tom thought for a moment. "It was like touching a plasma relay. That's what Harry called his first reaction to Tal. And from what the Doctor and I have learned that's probably about right. We analyzed the blood samples from Derren and a few other Varro people. There is a dormant virus in their bodies that, unfortunately, is very compatible with human body chemistry. It doesn't need much to pass it to another host, a touch of the hand, a breath and its all over. The Varro had all these grandiose ideas about the 'shared heart' but it's actually pretty much like catching a cold. Damn virus is so strong that we've had to start a new series of immunizations because it knocked them all out of whack. So until the virus leaves Harry's system, he's going to be pretty miserable. Too bad we can't just give him a hypospray of happiness." "I am not familiar with that expression." "Right now his beta endorphin levels are so low, that they almost don't register. The Doctor thinks that if he could raise the endorphin levels Harry would feel better, but at this point Harry doesn't want to feel better. To be honest this whole thing couldn't have come at a worse time." "Elaborate." The helmsman studied her for a moment before replying. "Its not just the relationship that's bothering Harry. That was just the final straw. First we had the monster that was trying to eat the ship. I saw Harry when he woke up. He was devastated. You saw how he was that night in Sandrine's. I couldn't even bring myself to ask him what the monster made him see. Then we went through the Borg encounter, which I'm sure brought back a lot of not so pleasant memories." She looked curiously at him. "The Borg cube," Tom said. "The last time he was on a Borg cube was when he was attacked by species 8472. He almost died. And then there he was again. Add to that the worry about what happened to you." "Ensign Kim was concerned about my not returning to Voyager?" "He was a little more than concerned Seven, he cares about you even if you...never mind," Tom said quietly. Seven looked at the Padd in his hands, "Is my examination over?" "What? Yes, it is, everything looks fine." "Thank you, I will leave now." ***** ***** ***** ***** Seven looked out the viewer of the Delta Flyer. The sun shone brightly outside, illuminating the wide variety of vegetation. She thought about something else, another 'straw' that added to Harry, Ensign Kim's, downward spiral. "You saw how he was that night in Sandrine's," Ensign Paris had said. She had witnessed more than that. Again, she wondered whether she should have mentioned it to Ensign Paris, and again she wondered why she had been reticent to do so. ***** ***** ***** ***** "Doctor, I still do not understand why we are here," Seven said, as they approached the holodeck. "I told you Seven. The crew has scheduled the Sandrine's program to run this evening. A kind of get together to celebrate the fact that we made it out of the monster alive. I'm sure that they'll want to thank us for saving them." "The crew has never expressed gratitude to me before. Why should this instance be different?" "Don't be such a pessimist Seven. Just come in and enjoy yourself," the Doctor said pressing the button to enter the holodeck. There were twenty-six crewmembers present, including Lieutenant Torres, Ensign Paris and Ensign Kim. Sandrine and the other holographic representations had not been activated. Something was wrong. She had only been to the Sandrine's holoprogram once before. Tonight there was no laughing and gossiping amongst crewmembers. All those present appeared somber. The Doctor motioned for her to follow him to the table that Ensign Paris and Lieutenant Torres were seated at. Ensign Kim was seated at the bar, alone. That was odd, she had never seen Ensign Kim deliberately distance himself from his friends. "Mr. Paris, Lieutenant Torres," the Doctor greeted them. He pulled out a chair for Seven and smiled benignly at them all. "Hey Doc," Ensign Paris greeted him. Lieutenant Torres nodded but did not greet them. Seven noticed that Ensign Paris' usual jovial manner was not present. "Ensign Paris, Lieutenant," he addressed them. "I heard about the party tonight, I'm surprised Mr. Neelix isn't present. I assumed as morale officer he attended all crew functions." "Neelix is with Naomi and Samantha tonight," Tom explained. "After what happened they needed a little personal TLC. Tender loving care," he explained to Seven, who nodded. "Besides, this isn't really an official party, just a get together. A pretty dismal one to be honest, you don't have to stay," he added. Seven detected a hopeful note in his voice which she found strange. "I'm surprised at the mood," the Doctor admitted. "You would think that they would be pleased to be alive." Tom and B'Elanna exchanged glances, his hand wound protectively around hers. Seven observed them, the Lieutenant seemed to derive comfort from her mate's presence. "You have to try and understand, Doc, what an incredible shock these people have had," Tom said gently. "One minute they're seeing their dreams unfold before them, and the next they wake up to find out that it was all fake. Add to that the thought that Voyager became, basically, a piece of projectile vomit puked up from the guts of a ship-eating monster. It kind of puts a damper on your enthusiasm." Tom brought his right hand up and placed it around the Lieutenant's shoulders, she leaned her head against it gratefully. Her action's puzzled Seven. Lieutenant Torres had always made a point of showing her Klingon strength and force of will, this was a side of her she had never seen before. The Doctor shook his head. "But you're all alive," he insisted. "You should be grateful." "Grateful?" they turned to see Ensign Kim behind them. He sank down in the chair next to Seven's and took another drink of water. "Grateful because we're right back where we started? Thanks for nothing." Seven watched the Ensign. He was in obvious pain. She knew of his deep attachment to his family, and how much he desired to be home. She wanted to...she was not sure, comfort him? But she was also uncertain as to whether he would accept her aid. The thought unsettled her, she reached out to grasp the glass of water in front of her, drinking deeply. Not noticing the startled looks from the Ensigns and the Lieutenant. Her eyes opened wide as she grasped her throat. "Seven what is it?" the Doctor asked. "Are you choking?" He jumped up to stand behind her. Shaking her head she waved him back. "Hot, burning," she managed to croak out. Harry reached out and poured a liquid from a pitcher, "Seven," he said gently. "Drink this. It's really water," he assured her. She grasped the glass and drank, grarepll for the cooling water that soothed her burning throat. The Doctor meanwhile was examining her glass. "I may not have a sense of taste," he admitted, "but my programmers did give me a sense of smell." He sniffed deeply, his eyes widening in surprise. "This is alcohol. This is not Synthahol," he stated firmly. "Where did the crew obtain alcohol?" "Let it go Doc," Tom said softly. "Let it go?" the Doctor said in disgust. "Starfleet regulations-" "To hell with Starfleet regulations," Ensign Kim cut him off coldly. "Harry," Ensign Paris cautioned him then turned to face the Chief Medical Officer. "Doc, they need this right now. A lot of people are really suffering and sometimes a good stiff drink is just what the Doctor ordered. No one's going to get hurt, there's a lot of security here, and they aren't drinking, just in case." "I don't know," the Doctor replied shaking his head. "Where did you procure alcohol? We haven't had extended contact with another race in a quite a while." Lieutenant Torres took a long swallow of her drink that made Seven grimace involuntarily and then spoke. "Apparently the crew of Voyager is a pretty inventive bunch." "It's homebrew Doc," Tom said quietly. "You?" the Doctor said in surprise. "No, not me," he replied. "It was made on Voyager and let's just leave it at that." "I do not understand," Seven began slowly, surprised that her voice sounded normal to her ears. After the horrid burning sensation she had experienced she expected some kind of rasping croak. The Doctor said in exasperation. "Someone on board Voyager is operating a still." Still puzzled, Seven asked, "A still what?" Without looking up from his glass Harry replied wearily, "A still is an apparatus for manufacturing alcohol." He then downed the contents of his glass and filled it again from the smaller of the two pitchers on the table. "An apparatus that requires a great deal of raw materials in the distillation process," the Doctor explained. "How?" he asked. B'Elanna grinned sardonically, "I guess leola root is good for something after all." The Doctor shook his head sadly, "I think it would be better for all involved if I just leave. I'm sure I'll be busy in the morning providing hangover treatments. Imagine that, I'm programmed with the medical expertise of 47 of the best physicians in the galaxy and I'll be called on to provide 'hair of the dog.' Are you coming Seven?" Seven began to automatically comply, but hesitated. "I believe I will stay for a short while longer." She looked at the three officers sitting at the table and asked, "If that is acceptable?" Tom nodded his head, "that's fine Seven." "Very well," the Doctor said. "Just remember that you have no tolerance for Synthahol and the affects of real alcohol will be far worse." "We'll watch out for her Doc," Tom replied. "I'll see you tomorrow." A silence settled on the table after the Doctor left, but unlike other uneasy silences she had experienced in the past, Seven felt comfortable with the other three people. Occasionally she sipped from the glass of water Ensign Kim had poured her. Looking up she caught his eyes on her, he looked down guiltily and drank several long swallows from his glass. In the short time she had been there he had drained two glasses of alcohol and she had no idea what he had consumed before her arrival. Finally, Ensign Paris spoke, "I guess this isn't the kind of party you were expecting Seven." She looked across the table at him, "I had no preconceived ideas of what to expect so I was not disappointed. The Doctor appeared to be disappointed." "I'm sorry about that," Tom said. "I'll try and explain things better to him tomorrow. One person I do want to thank is Naomi though." He smiled into B'Elanna's eyes and added, "To think of her disobeying a direct order from Chakotay, right to his face. I think that deserves an ice cream cone at least. I wish I'd seen it," he mused. "I'm sure that it was caught on security monitors," Seven pointed out. Her lips curling into a slight smile. A mischievous grin lit his face. "Tom," B'Elanna said cautiously. Innocently he said, "B'Elanna, I was thinking that if we were to show that part of the tape, it might make people feel better." "Sure you were," she said scornfully. Closing his eyes, he said mournfully. "It hurts that you doubt me like that." Smiling she rose and said, "Okay Paris let's go find that tape." "See you two later," he called out over his shoulder. The two people left at the table had watched the proceedings with amusement. Seven turned to Harry to ask a question and watched him suddenly seem to draw into himself. The smile leaving his face, as he concentrated on his drink. She felt a strong desire to bring that smile back to his face but was unsure what it would require. She wanted him to look at her, not the glass in his hand. Thinking back to the times she had amused him she asked, "Does what we are doing constitute 'drowning our sorrows?'' "Where did you hear that?" Harry said, his features softening slightly. "I've been researching the databases regarding idiomatic speech. Did I use the phrase correctly?" "Pretty much," he said quietly, "except that you usually drown sorrows in more than water." Without looking at her he asked, "I guess this all seems silly to you?" "No," she answered honestly. "When I first came onboard Voyager it would have seemed irrelevant. But I have found that while human reasoning is often illogical, it usually has its purpose. Do you believe that you will feel better in the morning?" "It's been so long since I've felt good that I'm not sure if I'll know when I'm feeling better," he answered her. Seven sipped from the glass of water, not sure how to respond. She thought of the way Ensign Paris had comforted Lieutenant Torres by placing his hand over hers. Would Ensign Kim react positively to that gesture? "Is your throat better?" he asked. She nodded, "Yes, I still feel a line of heat from my throat directly to my stomach, but curiously, it is not unpleasant." "No, it's not," he agreed. "It's been a long time since I've drank to get drunk, I'd forgotten how it makes me feel." Leaning towards him slightly she asked, "How does it make you feel?" "Reckless," he replied looking into her eyes. Suddenly he drew away from her as though embarrassed. Rising, he walked quickly out of the holodeck. Stunned, Seven could only watch the doors slide shut behind him. Rising slowly she realized that she had imbibed enough of the alcohol to impair her mobility slightly. Outside the holodeck she saw the turbolift door slide closed. Standing in the empty corridor a feeling of loneliness encircled her. She took several long, deep breaths to steady herself. She should return to Cargo Bay 2 to regenerate, she told herself, but felt curiously loath to do so. She did not want to be alone. Touching her commbadge she asked, "Computer, location of Ensign Kim?" :::Ensign Kim in the hydroponics bay::: Curious, she thought to herself. She had expected him to return to his quarters. Within a few moments she was entering the hydroponics bay. The rich, damp scent of the abundant vegetation was calming. Scanning the large room she heard a noise behind several rows of plants. She located Ensign Kim standing with his back toward her. His hands cupped the leaves of a bush and he appeared to be breathing in the scent. "Ensign," she said softly. He turned toward her, anger radiating from him. "Seven, what the hell are you doing here?" Confused by his outburst, she managed to blurt out, "You were intoxicated. I was concerned that you were unable to reach your quarters safely." "You've never been concerned before, why now?" "I have never seen you reckless before." "Oh, I know. Harry Kim the model Starfleet officer. Practically perfect in every way." She approached him cautiously. "Ensign why are you here?" He looked around the room. "I wanted to be around something real. I'm tired of holodecks, and dream giving monsters and..." he grimaced before adding. "Fantasies." He touched the plant nearest to him. "My mother used to grow some of these herbs in her garden. They're real." "Your quarters are real also, and you should return to them," Seven said, reaching out to gently lay her hand on his arm. He began to remove it, but instead held her hand in his and examined it. "Ensign?" she asked softly. "I've done everything right for five years and look what it's got me." He placed his left hand over hers and gently ran his fingers over the visible Borg exo-skeleton. "I always wondered what it felt like, so soft," he said with a note of wonder. He whispered, "My quarters are real all right. I go back there and they scream reality to me. The reality that I'm alone. You don't know what its like." The feeling of his fingers on her palm seemed to cause a warm wave to flow through her body. Her rational side screamed that she should remove her hand from his. But she wanted nothing more than for him to continue his explorations. "You are incorrect. I understand loneliness," she whispered, pressing herself closer. He brought her hand up to his cheek, delicately pressing it against his skin. Suddenly she felt his warm breath on her hand, his lips gently brushing her palm. Waves of warmth radiated through her body as a shudder parted her lips. At the same time, her legs seemed to weaken and she felt herself lean closer to him for support. "I don't mean the feeling of losing all the voices of the collective," he whispered, the timber of his voice added to the sounds of her blood rushing in her ears and made her shiver, her eyes fluttering closed as her emotions overwhelmed her. "None of us can ever understand what you went through," Harry said. "I'm talking about the feeling of waking up alone in your bed, wanting more than anything to be with one person." She forced herself to open her eyes. Looking into his she heard herself say, "There is no reason for you to be alone. I offered to explore my humanity with you, but you declined." Stricken, he brought her hand away from her face. His gentle caress gone, he held her hand tightly. The warmth of his eyes were replaced with cold anger as he spat out, "You didn't get it then and you don't get it now. I didn't just want to have sex with you. I wanted to you to love me as much as I loved you." She pulled her hand away from his. Anger fueled by rejection made her retort scathingly, "I am Borg. We do not love." His chest heaving from long repressed emotion, he responded, "That's what I kept telling myself. That I was pushing you into something that you didn't understand. That if I just took my time and helped you grow that eventually you'd care about me. Everyone was laughing at me. Poor, pathetic Harry, he's so out of his league, but I ignored them. Finally, I realized that they were right. I knew that one of these days we'd come across some alien that meets your Borg standards of perfection and you'll take him and it would kill me." He staggered back, resting on an overturned crate. "It took me a long time but I finally realized that I'd never be perfect enough for you." He brought his hands to his face, "I didn't want to admit it. I knew that for my own sanity I had to get on with my life." He sat motionless trying to control his heated emotions. Seven crept closer, unsure about what to do next, but needing to stay with him. Finally she heard, "I'm so tired." Knowing her presence might agitate him further, she spoke softly "Ensign you need to return to your quarters. Please come with me, I will assist you." Carefully she placed her arm around his shoulder, lifting him gently. He moved with her as trustingly as Naomi Wildman. The corridors were deserted and their luck held in the turbolift also. When they reached his quarters she entered an override command and almost carried him into the room. Moving toward the sleeping area she removed his jacket before laying him on the bed. Carefully she removed his boots, then drew the covers over him. He stirred, opening his eyes and looking into hers. "I'm sorry, Seven," he murmured. His warm brown eyes seemed to envelop her as she sat down next to him. She smiled softly at him. He looked so helpless at that moment, she wondered at the feelings of protectiveness he stirred in her, she should have been upset that he had allowed himself to get in this condition. "There is nothing to apologize for." He reached out and took her hand in his. "I didn't mean to yell at you. I just couldn't take dreaming of you anymore, and waking up every morning alone. It was just too hard. Tonight, I wanted to stay by myself but as soon as you came in I had to be with you. But it wasn't your fault." "Perhaps it was," she said. She forced herself to pull her eyes away from his, the warmth of his gaze interrupting her thought processes. "It is possible that I handled the situation incorrectly. I was unfamiliar with the feelings I was experiencing and rejected them. Perhaps we can start again and change the nature of our affiliation in a more acceptable manner." She waited for a response from him, hearing none she looked down at him, only to find his eyes closed, a gentle smile on his face and his hand still gently holding hers. She smiled down at him and removed his hand carefully. They would talk in the morning, she decided. ***** ***** ***** ***** Seven looked around the Delta Flyer forcing herself back to the present. She rubbed her hand against her thigh. She could still feel the way his warm breath has caressed her palm. And the way his lips had felt as they pressed softly against her fingertips. She had hoped that they could meet, possibly during a meal to discuss the recent happenings. Unfortunately she had seen him only for a few minutes on the bridge when she delivered a Padd with Astrometrics data to Commander Chakotay. She glanced at him as she left and caught a glimpse that bespoke of acute embarrassment. Later that day she saw him in a corridor, he appeared uncomfortable when she approached him. ***** ***** ***** ***** "Ensign Kim, you are recovered from your inebriation?" she attempted to ask cordially. "Um, yeah I feel fine, well I mean I feel fine now. The Doctor gave me something to take away the headache, so I'm okay." "I am pleased to hear that. I was concerned for you last evening," Seven said moving closer to him. Ensign Kim moved back, his retreat impeded by the bulkhead. Flushing with embarrassment he said, "Seven I'm sorry about last night. I said things, did things that I shouldn't have. I'm sorry you had to help me get to bed," he murmured. "That was not a problem," she assured him. "I had considered removing your clothing, since I understand that most humans do not sleep fully clothed, however I thought that you would be uncomfortable with my seeing you unclothed." Closing his eyes he said earnestly, "Thanks for not taking my clothes off. Your right, I would have been uncomfortable." "You are welcome." "Look Seven, I need to get down to Engineering B'Elanna's having some problems that she wants me to look at. See you later," he called out moving swiftly down the corridor. ***** ***** ***** ***** Seven thought that perhaps she would wait a day or so for him to recover from his embarrassment and them attempt to engage him in conversation. That had not happened because the next day they encountered the Varro ship. They had never had their chance to talk. She relived the pain she had felt when she understood the full implications of his relationship with the Varro female. The clutch of pain she felt in her abdomen when he asked her about love. The cold pleasure she had taken in deliberately pretending to misunderstand his wish for her to leave Sickbay. She felt the familiar stinging in her eyes and the pressure of her nasal cavities that were a precursor to tears. She looked up at the bulkhead knowing that would relieve the symptoms somewhat. She would not cry, she told herself. It had been one hour since she had last checked his status. Placing the Padd on the computer console she walked to the small area allotted as Sickbay. He lay on a biobed, his rhythmic breathing reassuring. She wondered when he would awaken as she stood beside the biobed. His shining, jet hair was in disarray. She remembered the night she had approached him in the Messhall to thank him for the work he had done in Astrometrics. His hair had been disordered that night also. His posture expressed pain and fatigue. It had bothered her that he was in such obvious discomfort. It had also angered her that he would allow himself to suffer needlessly. It was then that she realized that she had lost her objectivity. All she wanted was for him to be well. She wanted the other Ensign Kim that smiled when she entered a room. She wanted to rearrange his hair into its previously, shining precision. Resting one hand on the biobed, the other came up and softly smoothed his hair back into place. She was surprised by its softness. The strands fell through her fingers like water, it was pleasing. She brought her hand down and gently touched his cheek. Suddenly his hand covered the resting hand, and she froze in surprise. A pair of warm brown eyes were looking into hers. She stared guiltily into them, before managing to ask, "Do you know who you are?" "Ensign Harry Kim, Federation Starship Voyager," was the prompt response. "Yes," she said softly, a warm flush of relief flowed through her body. "Who are you?" he asked. Seven froze. Some memory loss had been expected, but not to this extent. "I am Seven of Nine." "You're Borg!" Harry choked out. Suddenly, he savagely pushed her away and rolled off the biobed. He looked frantically around the room as he backed away from her. He grasped his head appearing disoriented. "Harry, please stop," Seven gasped. "Harry! Be careful!" Neelix shouted as he ran into the room. "Neelix get back," Harry rasped out. "Call for help." "It's okay Harry," the Talaxian said soothingly as he slowly approached him. "Seven's not going to hurt you." "She's Borg," the Ensign said, as he circled the biobed. "She's a part of our crew. You just don't remember. You had a pretty bad bump on the head. Seven fixed it, but while your brain heals you're going to have some memory problems," Neelix reached him, placing a gentle hand on his arm. "You're a member of our crew?" Harry asked, his eyes wide with surprise. "I am," Seven acknowledged. "I have been a member of the crew for almost eighteen months." "Harry what do you remember?" Neelix asked anxiously. "I remember being on the Borg cube," he answered holding his temples. Seven stared intently at him. "And...being attacked by species 8472. It's hazy after that," he said apologetically. "It's okay," Neelix soothed him. "Don't worry. You're going to be fine. A lot has happened since then and I'd be glad to fill you in, but you have to let Seven examine you." Harry looked apprehensive, but allowed Neelix to lead him to the biobed. Seven took up the Tricorder and programmed in commands. Harry overtly studied her as she studied the readings. With a raised brow she looked into his eyes. Normally he would have dropped his eyes in embarrassment, instead he responded with a grin and a look of frank interest. Almost involuntarily her lips curved into a slight smile and she felt that familiar rush of warmth she only encountered in his presence, "As I expected, the damage to your cerebellum produced some memory loss. I am confident that when the swelling recedes that portion of your memory will return." He nodded in understanding before asking, "What is this place?" "This is the Delta Flyer," Neelix replied. "It's a ship that you, Tom, B'Elanna and Seven designed using Borg and Starfleet technology." "Really? We built it?" he asked looking to Seven for confirmation. She nodded, her lips curving gently. "Your examination is complete. Would you like to see the rest of the ship?" "You bet," he said hopping off the biobed. Suddenly he paused and raised his hands to his head. "Ensign is there a problem?" Seven asked. "Just a little dizzy," he said apologetically. "I guess I jumped up too fast." "You may lean on my arm until you feel well enough to walk on your own," Seven informed him. Harry gratefully grasped her arm and smiled into her eyes. "Just a minute you two," Neelix said. "I came back to see about breakfast. Why don't I get it while you look around the ship?" "Breakfast sounds great. I'm starving," Harry announced. Neelix and Seven exchanged a quick glance. "Wonderful," the Morale Officer proclaimed. "Since you've been injured and if you were on the ship you'd be allowed a replicated meal in Sickbay I'll get you anything you like for breakfast." Harry's face lit with a wide smile, "Great, I'll have waffles with sausage and eggs and maybe some coffee." "Got it," Neelix replied his face bright. "Seven, what can I get you?" "A nutritional supplement bar would be acceptable and a glass of water." "Yuck," Harry said in disgust. "That's it?" "That is all I require," she replied. "She's still adapting to eating food," Neelix explained. "Seven, let me get you something nice. Trust me," he said over his shoulder as he hurried off. Harry noticed Seven's look of disbelief and smiled, "I guess Neelix's cooking skills haven't improved in eighteen months?" "According to the crew they have. However I still find that most of his meals are over spiced and unsettling to my stomach," she replied with derision. To change the subject Harry asked with a wide grin, "Do I get my tour of the Delta Flyer now?" She returned his smile, nodded and began to explain the ship's construction. This occupied them for almost a quarter of an hour. Harry was enthralled, asking rapid fire questions that Seven willingly answered. Before they were finished Neelix was calling them to breakfast. Seated around a small round table he proudly presented their dishes. "Seven for you I have one waffle with strawberries and whipped cream." Sitting gracefully down, Seven studied the plate before her. The arrangement of the golden waffle, white cream and red berries pleased her. "Thank you," she said. "Looks great Neelix," Harry said from his place next to Seven. He poured coffee for them all as they began their meal. "Seven's been filling me in on the Delta Flyer but I want to know what's happened with everybody on Voyager. "First, lets eat up, and then we'll talk," Neelix insisted. He got no arguments from Harry as they all applied themselves to their meal. As they ate, he studied the two young people before him. Harry, his appetite vigorous for the first time in weeks. And Seven, seemed to actually enjoy her meal. He listened to their casual conversation that they seemed unable to completely forego. Harry's smiles and gentle teasing of Seven's mannerisms. And Seven responding with 'Borgisms.' The name Tom had given for her unique speech patterns and usage. Seven appeared to be tossing them into the conversation for the sole purpose of amusing Harry. All of it gave him hope. Neelix was a romantic at heart. There had always been something special between these two, a kind of innocence that all Seven's vast intelligence and Harry's brushes with death couldn't dampen. He had noticed how concerned Seven had been after Harry's time with Derren Tal. Maybe this memory loss wasn't a bad thing. Harry asked, "Neelix, how's Kes?" The Talaxian's smile dimmed. "Kes is no longer with us." "I'm sorry," the Ensign said gently, laying his hand on his friend's arm. "Don't be," he replied. "She's not dead. At least not in the way that we think of death." He went on to explain Kes' change to another plane of existence as well as he could, adding that her gift had cut ten years off their journey. He explained about other changes on Voyager. How much closer to the Alpha Quadrant they were. Rejoicing about Tom and B'Elanna's relationship. The beginning of his tactical training with Tuvok. Seven listened carefully to the morale officer. He seemed to carefully avoid any unpleasant happenings. That was appropriate, she thought approvingly. In order to completely overcome the virus it was vital that Ensign Kim keep a positive mental attitude. She thought about what Ensign Paris had said, 'He could use a hypospray of happiness.' Seven resolved to herself that she would do anything she could to keep Ensign Kim happy. She looked up from her ruminations when the Ensign pushed his plate back and sighed. "Are you all right Harry?" Neelix asked anxiously. "I'm fine. I'm sorry I can't finish it, it was really good," Harry answered him. "Don't worry. That's fine. I'm just glad that you ate as much as you did. Considering what…I mean. Never mind," the Talaxian said, standing up quickly as he began to clear the table. "Wait a minute," Harry addressed them both. "Is something wrong? Did something happen to me? Seven?" he said looking worriedly at her. Ignoring Neelix's beseeching glance, Seven explained calmly, "You have been ill. You contracted a virus. It was not life threatening." Sitting back in his chair, Harry smiled, "You mean something bad happened to me that wasn't life threatening? That's a first." Neelix and Seven nodded with relief as Harry continued, "So what are our plans for the day?" "Our plans?" Seven repeated. "We need to run a ship wide diagnostic in order to determine if any serious damage was incurred during the ion storm. Also I had planned to use the optical scanner to chart the terrain in order to determine likely food sources." "Well that sounds nice and boring," Harry replied wryly. "Can't we go out and take a look around for ourselves?" "He's right," Neelix affirmed. "Having already been out once this morning I can tell you that the planet is beautiful. I've located and marked places for the shore leave crews to start harvesting. I even brought back a basket of the most delightful berries. They've already been scanned, are perfectly safe and loaded with nutrients." "I had not planned on an excursion," Seven said doubtfully. "Not an excursion, a picnic!" Neelix said with glee. He clapped his hands together and continued. "Yes, I'll pack you both a nice lunch and you go out and explore. There is a brook about twenty meters east, you can follow it up and see what you can find." "That sounds great Neelix," Harry nodded. "If its okay with you Seven?" "A pic-nic?" Seven said hesitantly. "A meal eaten out of doors? I am not sure that it would be an efficient use of time." "Of course it would efficient," Neelix asserted. "You and Harry are going to look for a good place for the crew to set up a satellite base camp." "What's the matter Seven?" Harry asked with a sly smile. "You sound like you're afraid to go outside." he challenged. "I was Borg. I fear nothing," she replied dryly. "Very well, we will venture out and locate a base camp. I do have to run a diagnostic, it will require approximately thirty minutes." "Wonderful," Neelix sighed. "I'll see to putting the berries in stasis containers and pack you a nice lunch." "Great," Harry said. "I want to go change clothes," he stuck a finger into the tight collar of his turtleneck. "This uniform is definitely not appropriate for the climate." As Seven began the diagnostic she heard Harry add, "Wait a minute Neelix, I have a few ideas about picnic food for you." Later, she was so intent on her work that that his approach went unnoticed. Entering commands she was surprised to hear a voice almost directly behind her chair. "That's not part of any diagnostic I know of." "You are correct," she replied without looking back. "I am rechecking the subspace message I sent to Voyager regarding our arrival, the status of your injuries and your current condition." She felt his hands rest on the back of her chair, his knuckles brushing her shoulders. "Currently, I'm in great condition," he asserted. "On the contrary, you suffered severe trauma to the cerebellum. Your memory has been affected. It is nothing to jest at," she replied seriously. "I'm just joking," he said, gently resting his hands on her shoulders. "There is nothing laughable about it. You were in serious condition. I monitored you throughout the night. It was not until 0300 that you began sleeping normally." Seven closed her eyes. Thoughts of what could have happened to him, coupled with his close proximity were playing havoc with her composure. Concentrate, she told herself and then heard his voice, "I guess the injury was more serious than I thought. I'm sorry to cause you all that trouble." She turned to look into the deep brown eyes so close to her own. Swallowing to force down the lump in her throat that threatened to be another precursor to tears she said softly, "It was no trouble. I am just relieved that you are well." As if of it's own volition her hand came up and gently touched his cheek. She smiled as his hand came to rest on hers. His eyes flickered briefly to her lips and then returned. Seven calculated that by moving forward 22.5 centimeters her lips would touch his. Suddenly, he took a step back, standing straight and clearing his throat, he asked, "I wonder if Neelix is finished packing our lunch?" Taking a deep breath Seven observed to herself that while this Harry Kim was in some ways different from the Ensign she was accustomed to, in some ways he was irritatingly similar. She focused her attention on his attire instead. He wore black athletic shorts and shoes. He had also reversed his gray turtleneck tee-shirt letting it hang unfastened, revealing a black tank top underneath. Her eyes traveled up to rest on his rather flushed face inquiringly. "I didn't pack much in the way of off duty clothes. I had to replicate the shorts," he said apologetically. "I can't figure out why I wouldn't have packed something to hang out in," he said thoughtfully. Seven declined to comment on why he not packed casual attire "Your lunch is packed," Neelix informed as he briskly entered the bridge. "Along with all the gear that you'll need at the campsite. As soon as you locate a place to set up camp I'll beam everything to you there," he said with enthusiasm. "Thanks, Neelix," Harry said. He turned to ask Seven, "Did you want to change before we go?" "I had not intended to change my attire," she responded. "Oh you should Seven," Neelix spoke up. "Maybe you can put on that outfit you wore when you ran that amusement park program with Naomi. That looked nice and comfortable." With a cold glance at her two companions, Seven replied, "Very well, I will change my attire. I did not bring those articles of clothing with me, however I do process sufficient replicator credits to obtain a duplicate." That said she strode off of the bridge. When they heard the door to the sleeping compartments close Harry turned to his friend. "Neelix, I need to know about what's going on with me and Seven?" "What do you mean?" the Talaxian asked innocently. Harry turned to look out at the surrounding terrain before replying. "Is there something between us? I mean are we together?" "Do you think there's something between you?" he replied. The Ensign raised a hand to his chest and said, "There's something, but I don't know.." he faltered. Taking a deep breath he said softly, "It's more than the fact that she is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. I feel like I know her, I care about her and I think she cares about me. Am I wrong? Is it just my imagination? She's not seeing someone is she?" "No, she's not dating anyone. And you're right, there is something between you. You and she work together more than any other people on board." "She told me about us setting up Astrometrics," Harry acknowledged. "She said we work very well together." "You do," Neelix assured him. "But we aren't together?" Harry asked soberly. Neelix smiled at the young man in front of him. Laying a hand on his arm he replied, "You have to understand Harry, Seven had spent almost twenty years in the Collective. She was just six when she was assimilated. She's had to relearn how to be a human. And she had to grow emotionally. Just because you aren't together romantically doesn't mean she's not fond of you. It's just taken a while. Look at it this way, it took Tom and B'Elanna three years to get together and they were mature adults." With a wry grimace Harry replied, "Adults maybe, but the mature part I'm not sure about." Laughing, the Talaxian replied, "They've really grown up since they became involved. Maybe it's time for you and Seven now." "Thanks Neelix," the Ensign replied. While this discussion was going on, another silent one, was going on in the sleeping compartment. As Seven pulled on a pair of gray Capri's she thought of Neelix's comment, 'Get into something more comfortable Seven.' When would the crew realize that her unitard was more comfortable than their standard uniforms? Her apparel had the added advantage of having undergarments encapsulated in the fabric to facilitate ease of dressing, she thought, checking the fit of the white tank top she wore. Grimacing slightly she checked to make sure that the straps to the brassiere were concealed. Sitting down on the bed she pulled on a pair of gray athletic shoes. Rising she pulled on the short gray jacket to complete her outfit. She remembered when Ensign Wildman and Naomi had helped her pick out the clothing. Ensign Wildman, Samantha, she reminded herself, said that gray was a good addrlor on her. Examining herself in the mirror mounted on the back of the door, she was at a loss to understand how one color was better than another. She looked directly into her reflection. Her eyes seemed exceptionally solemn even for her normally stoic countenance. She thought about Harry waiting for her on the bridge and their intended excursion. It was a date, she smiled to herself. A date, after all the time she had spent with Ensign Kim they were finally going to go on a date. Standing back from the mirror Seven took a breath and smoothed an almost unnoticeable wrinkle in the jacket. She considered her relationship with Ensign Kim. He had been a constant during her time on Voyager. The first person she had had extended contact with. His attraction to her had been obvious at their first meeting. At first she had toyed with him, finding his presence both enticing and distracting. Gradually, thoughts of him interrupted her normally precise mind, it had annoyed her, she acknowledged. She decided that the situation would not be tolerated. To that effect she began to purposely hold herself back when they worked together. It had surprised her when she realized how much she missed the feeling of his body near hers. The fact of the matter was that he had interpreted her distance as indifference when the opposite was true. Resolutely she walked out the door to the bridge. There would be no more looking back. She would send no more 'mixed signals.' She felt a flutter of trepidation in her abdomen as she walked onto the bridge. It dissipated when Harry greeted her presence with a warm smile of appreciation. "You look great," he told her. "Thank you," she remembered to respond. "You two have fun," Neelix said. "Thanks Neelix," Harry responded. He slung a small pack over his shoulder as he walked over to open the hatch. He then held his arm out to her. Remembering the Doctor's lessons in etiquette she placed her hand on his arm. He smiled and asked as they walked down the ramp. "So, Seven, are you ready to explore the great unknown?" Earnestly she replied, "Yes, I am." END PART 1